The Practice and Habit of Happiness
How to Be Happy: 12 Habits to Add to Your Routine
IF you do an online search of the question, “What is happiness?”, there’s every chance your search engine will request emergency leave for the rest of the day. This deceptive and slippery question assumes happiness is singular and definable, ignoring its subjectivity, cultural differences, and transient nature.
Happiness can be a fleeting emotion from a burst of joy when receiving good news. Other times, it’s a mood – a general sense of positivity that lasts for hours or days. More broadly, it can be a state of being influenced by life circumstances, personal values, and our environment.
Some people assume happiness is a feeling that comes and goes, rather than something we can create for ourselves. A new book on the topic invites us to question this assumption. Written by Prof Alvin Ng and Janessa Tan, Happiness: Mastering the 5Gs For an Enhanced You (2025), serves as an insightful companion on how we can create “micro moments of joy” and build our personal happiness fund.
The “5Gs of happiness” are greeting, giving, gratitude, glorifying skilfulness in others, and giggling. At first glance, these seem obvious. Say “Hello” to people. Be generous. Express thanks. Acknowledge others’ strengths. Laugh more. It sounds simple, but nowadays we’re often so caught up in the busyness of living that we forget these qualities that are crucial to maintaining connections, friendships, and our well-being.
When did you last enjoy a genuine laugh? Not the polite kind, but the deep, unrestrained kind that momentarily dissolves life’s worries. When was the last time you expressed admiration to a colleague, friend, or your partner? These micro moments of joy add up, subtly influencing how we engage with others.
At the book launch last month, Ng spoke about these ideas with his trademark dry wit. He, like me, doesn’t consider himself the most naturally joyful person. But we both recognise the value of creating and sharing moments of happiness.
Giggling, for example, might seem like a small thing, but it has profound effects. Laughter isn’t just a social nicety; it helps relieve stress and tension. During the launch, I was thinking about the importance of laughter and playfulness. Play isn’t just for children. Psychologists like Donald Winnicott and Mihály Csíkszentmihályi have shown that play fosters creativity, reduces stress, and enriches engagement with life. We lose something essential when we take life too seriously.
Many of us have been conditioned to see happiness as secondary to productivity. We prioritise deadlines, responsibilities, and efficiency, often at the cost of connection. But happiness and success aren’t mutually exclusive. Research shows that positive emotions increase creativity, resilience, and workplace performance.
The challenge is that happiness isn’t passive – it requires effort. This is where Ng and Tan’s book comes in handy. It’s a practical guide to integrating well-being into everyday life. It doesn’t promise a life without hardship. Instead, it offers a roadmap to finding moments of joy amid the ups and downs.
Giving is a prime example. Even a small act – checking in on a friend, buying someone a coffee, offering a word of encouragement – can create a ripple effect. Generosity fuels connection, and connection is central to well-being.
Glorifying skilfulness in others is another overlooked aspect of happiness. In competitive environments, we often focus on our own achievements. But when we take the time to recognise others’ strengths, we build relationships focused on appreciation rather than rivalry.
Gratitude is perhaps the most familiar of the 5Gs. But knowing its importance and practising it are two different things. Studies suggests that actively expressing gratitude – not just feeling it – increases life satisfaction. A simple “Thank you” can strengthen connections and shift our focus from what we lack to what we have.
Then there’s greeting. In a digital age where communication is often reduced to texts and emails, a sincere, in-person greeting carries weight. It signals recognition, fosters warmth, and strengthens bonds. Offering a smileora friendly nod can brighten someone’s day.
Given the rise in rates of loneliness and disconnection over the past decade,
Happiness is a timely reminder that these problems won’t fix themselves. Reading this book is a reminder that happiness isn’t a luxury – it’s a necessity, and it’s something we can create.
Of course, life will never be free from difficulty. Stress and setbacks are part of our experience – and that’s precisely why these moments of happiness matter. They don’t erase hardships, but they provide balance. They remind us that even in difficult times, joy is still possible.
For those sceptical about selfhelp books, this one is refreshingly down-to-earth. Ng and Tan don’t offer unrealistic promises of enduring bliss. Instead, they acknowledge that happiness is a practice – a habit to be nurtured. Their reflections, drawn from psychology, personal experience, and Buddhist philosophy, offer a realistic approach to well-being.
But just reading their book won’t change much. By applying and sharing the ideas found in Happiness, perhaps we can become happier over time, not just in fleeting bursts, but in ways that last.- - Sandy Clarke
Sandy Clarke has long held an interest in emotions, mental health, mindfulness and meditation. He believes the more we understand ourselves and each other, the better societies we can create. If you have any questions or comments, e-mail lifestyle@thestar.com.my. The views expressed here are entirely the writer’s own.
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